Western Hikikomori: Hermits of the Modern World

Mjriam Partipilo Cancado is a doctor in psychoanalysis. She is a psychoanalyst in private practice in Fort Lauderdale, Florida, US. She is also a clinical supervisor and Instructor. Mjriam is the co-founder of the Corpo Freudiano in the United States.

The term "hikikomori" was first coined by Japanese psychiatrist Saito Tamaki (1998) in his book "Hikikomori: Adolescence without End". Hikikomori literally means "pulling inward" or "being confined". It describes adolescents and young adults who voluntarily socially exclude themselves, living reclusively in their homes or rooms without displaying clear signs of psychological distress or mental illness. They share traits of enduring isolation and avoidance of social relationships, finding it difficult to extricate themselves from this state. Hikikomori involves youths retreating into an idealistic world when they are unable to meet societal standards of success. This behavior may be reconsidered as a maladaptive coping strategy, potentially resembling a form of attempted suicide. These phenomena are generally limited to specific societies or cultural areas and are viewed as culturally specific expressions of mental illness. As Lacan taught us, culture is integral to the individual, shaping the psychic apparatus. In fact, individual psychological phenomena cannot be fully understood in isolation from the social context in which they occur. Beguin (1952) rightly stated: “One is mad in relation to a given society.” Initially regarded as unique to Japan, the hikikomori are now recognized as a phenomenon that can manifest in different cultures under specific social conditions. Regardless of cultural differences, a common characteristic among affected individuals is a pervasive fear of the external world.

Hikikomori is a subgroup of NEETs - “people who are not employed, not in school, not a homemaker, and not seeking a job” and Hikikomori are “those who are neither in work nor school, do not have social interactions and are socially withdrawn for more than 6 months.” Nicholas Eberstadt (2022), in his book Men Without Work, describes NEETs as “a sort of invisible army, ghost soldiers lost in an overlooked modern-day depression”. As Hikikomori, NEETs also share the tendency towards social isolation and lack of sense of belonging and, most importantly, live outside the labor force altogether and by choice. Both Hikikomori and Neets, in an attempt to rebel to the status quo, deviate from mainstream values and culturally common behaviors. They seem to have relinquished responsibilities and freed themselves from any obligations to others and society, filling their time with activities for more immediate gratification. They seem ‘infantilized’, as they often financially depend on their family, partners or government.

Edward Hopper - Hotel Room (1931)

"Hikikomori literally means 'pulling inward' or 'being confined'... retreating into an idealistic world... resembling a form of attempted suicide."

The overwhelming majority of hikikomori and NEETs are men. Many authors, observing hikikomori in different western countries seem to agree on the following main risk factors: a temperamental predisposition to withdrawal; an insecure-ambivalent attachment style; family relationships featuring an overprotective mother, extremely attached to her child, and a substantially absent father; the child seem the depository of the idealizations and the great expectations of his family. After this relational constellation is formed, later in life, during adolescence or young adulthood, a single triggering event may be enough to precipitate the individual in social withdrawal. Hikikomori clearly remembers the experience that serves as a trigger for their withdrawal and use it as a marker of the before and after life. The most clinically interesting part of the hikikomori experience is that, even if they admit having voluntarily chosen their self-reclusion, they experience anxiety and angst about their condition. Inherently enough, the choice to interrupt relationships with others in order to protect themselves from disappointment and hurt, it also represents an additional difficulty in their recovery because they lack a meaningful contact with others. As Saito Tamaki (1998) says in his book: “the very fact of being in a state of withdrawal is itself traumatic in its effects”.

But how can we use psychoanalysis to shed light into the hikikomori? My hypothesis regarding these new phenomena suggests a progression from an obsessive fantasy of escaping reality and adopting a hermit-like existence to the actual manifestation of this transformation into reality. Psychoanalysts often encounter the hermit fantasy in obsessive patients. Freud (1930) described hermits in Civilization and Its Discontents as people who reject the world, viewing reality as the enemy and source of all suffering. He noted that hermits believe breaking all ties with reality is necessary for happiness. Hikikomoris exemplify this defensive mechanism to an extreme by making it their everyday reality. They become literal hermits, confined to their own rooms. Both parents and therapists of hikikomori patients describe them as extremely fragile and vulnerable in the face of a world perceived as threatening and competitive (homo homini lupus: "a man is a wolf to a man"). Lacan posits that the underlying objective of the retreat is more profound, as the obsessional's desire to eliminate the Other is intrinsically linked to the fantasy of eradicating their own desire. According to Lacan (Seminar VIII, The Transference, 1960-1961), the obsessional neurotic "bases the entirety of his fantasy on his own evacuation". Indeed, in working with obsessionals, we repeatedly encounter the inquiry, "Am I dead or alive?".

People with obsessional structures often want the Other to go away or be quiet. They aim to break free from the dependency on the Other, who is both the source of their desire and the object they want to destroy. They neither want to let go of what they have nor give the Other anything they perceive he might want. The hikikomori phenomenon represents an extreme quest for independence from the Other and the subject’s responsibility to the Other. Hikikomoris completely abandon the social scene.

The hikikomori phenomenon involves individuals attempting to reconcile their internal self with the demands of the external environment. Hikikomori individuals perceive the world as demanding, insensitive, and regulated by external pressures that challenge their ability to adapt without conforming to societal expectations. As a result, hikikomori has evolved into a subculture that promotes social isolation as a choice or reaction against society. This is in contrast with today's highly connected and visibility-seeking world. While many seek attention, hikikomori choose solitude, almost as if they live with the aim of disappearing.

Edward Hopper - Office in a Small City (1953)

"The hikikomori phenomenon represents an extreme quest for independence from the Other and the subject’s responsibility to the Other... the obsessional's desire to eliminate the Other is intrinsically linked to the fantasy of eradicating their own desire... almost as if they live with the aim of disappearing... leading to a loss of identity and meaning".

Feeling rejected and hurt by the world, hikikomoris choose isolation to calm their anxieties and insecurities. They live in an obsessive fantasy of freedom from societal demands, however leading to a loss of identity and meaning. Prolonged isolation turns what initially seemed like a choice into the only option, erasing memories through daily monotony and triggering destructive thoughts, compulsive behaviors, aggression, and depression. Listening to hikikomoris reveals that the romanticization of their withdrawal gradually gives way to significant anguish, ultimately resulting in a conflict. They distinctly recall the experiences that led to their withdrawal, but even though they assert that they are free to return at any time or when suitable circumstances arise, they express anxiety and often panic about their uncertain role in society following such an extended period of withdrawal. The memory of the triggering event remains clear, although recounting it does not elicit any emotional response. The emotional response becomes more prominent when the discussion extends to the possibility of returning to the world. The call from the external world appears to reignite an aspiration for reengagement through the Other. The Other may now be perceived as desiring rather than demanding. This Other invites, calls, and gently brings light from the external world. It contrasts with the initial Other from whom he fled—an Other characterized by suffocating demands and threats.

In 2007, Luca Tornatore, an Italian writer and movie director, released a film titled Hikikomori. The film depicts the life of a 30-year-old man who, apart from holding a part-time job, remains isolated from society and resides in ‘alley of silence’.  Silence is an essential signifier of the story. In fact, a notable aspect of the movie is that the protagonist's voice is rarely heard by others. His voice is heard when, after several attempts, he manages to speak to a girl he initially made eye contact with on the train. Once again, the hope to return to life is mediated by the encounter with an Other that evokes desire. I believe that the isolation resulting from this new societal system represents the most significant challenge of our time. The diminishing human contact and weakening social bonds are likely major contributors to the extremism we are encountering and the profound sense of loneliness experienced by children and young people. The importance of communities that facilitate ongoing human interaction and strengthen social connections is undeniable, and we must prioritize the reconstruction of these essential spaces.

Bibliography:

Beguin, A. (1952) Qui est fou? Esprit 1952; 20: 777-88

Eberstadt, N. (2022) Post-Pandemic Edition Men Without Work, Templon Press, West Conshohocken, PA

Freud, S. (1930), Civilization and Its Discontents, The Standard Edition of the Complete Psychological Works of Sigmund Freud, Volume XXI

Lacan, J. (1960-1961), Il Seminario, Libro VIII, Il Transfert, Piccola Biblioteca Einaudi, Torino

Tamaki, S. (1998) Hikikomori: Adolescence without End, University of Minnesota Press (Translated by Jeffrey Angels – 2013)

Tornatore, L. (2007) Hikikomori, Film